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Who is Oprah Winfrey’s ‘spiritual partner’ of nearly four decades, Stedman Graham? The media billionaire met her beau at a charity event in 1986, but they never married or had kids – here’s why

Oprah Winfrey (left) and Stedman Graham (right) have been together for almost four decades. Photo: @oprah/ Instagram
Oprah Winfrey is one of the richest entertainment moguls out there, boasting a net worth of US$3 billion in 2024, according to Forbes.
Oprah Winfrey has a net worth of US$3 billion. Photo: @oprah/Instagram

From her gigantic property portfolio and savvy investments, to her highly successful media empire, Winfrey hardly needs an introduction, being a household name in the US and in many parts of the globe.

Yet less is known about her love life. Despite dating the same man for nearly four decades, Winfrey rarely talks about her long-time partner, Stedman Graham. Considering they’ve been together for so long, Graham has seen his girlfriend transition into the mega-celebrity she is today.

But who is he exactly?

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What does Oprah Winfrey’s partner Stedman Graham do for work?

Stedman Graham has written multiple books, including on topics such as leadership. Photo: @stedmangraham/Instagram

According to his website, Graham, 73, is an established author of 12 books, and a speaker and educator. The same source adds that he is a business adviser, and chairman and CEO of S. Graham and Associates. The New Jersey native has worked on leadership programmes across the globe, in the Netherlands, Germany, China, Canada, the UK, Bermuda and South Africa.

He has a daughter

Oprah Winfrey and her partner Stedman Graham have been together since the 1980s. Photo: Getty Images

Graham has one child, Wendy Graham, from his previous marriage to a woman named Glenda Graham, per Elle. As reported by British media, Wendy tied the knot with engineer Bradley Kerwin Greene in 2015.

How did Stedman Graham and Oprah Winfrey meet?

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham doing a puzzle together, two months into the Covid-19 quarantine. Photo: @oprah/Instagram

Per Vanity Fair, Winfrey, 70, and her then future beau met for the first time in 1986 at a charity event, and they’ve stuck together ever since. When asked by People in 2023 about their relationship, Winfrey quipped, “The most romantic thing I do is make hot water cornbread. Every time I do it it’s like the most romantic thing I’ve ever done.”

According to her 1992 interview with People, Winfrey said her producers were initially sceptical of her new beau, an almost 200cm former athlete and occasional sportswear model. “They figured if he looked like that, he either had to be a jerk or want something,” she told the publication. “He’s kind and supportive … Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo. But you want someone who’ll help you catch the bus.”

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Why did Stedman Graham and Oprah Winfrey never get married or have kids?

Despite being together for almost four decades, Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham are not married. Photo: @oprah/Instagram

Winfrey never ended up getting married or having kids – but they were engaged at one point. In her column on O, The Oprah Magazine, she wrote about how she had doubts after saying yes to his proposal.

“I realised I didn’t actually want a marriage. I wanted to be asked,” she added. “I wanted to know he felt I was worthy of being his missus, but I didn’t want the sacrifices, the compromises, the day-in-day-out commitment required to make a marriage work. My life with the show was my priority, and we both knew it.” She described their union as a “spiritual partnership”.

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In another interview, she opened up about having children. “At one point in Chicago, I had bought an additional apartment because I was thinking, ‘Well, if we get married, I’m going to need room for children,’” Winfrey told People.

She continued, “I don’t have the ability to compartmentalise the way I see other women do. It is why, throughout my years, I have had the highest regard for women who choose to be at home [with] their kids, because I don’t know how you do that all day long. Nobody gives women the credit they deserve.”

Stedman Graham speaking to inmates at Lee Correctional Institution in Bishopville, South Carolina. Photo: @stedmangraham/Instagram

Winfrey has, in the meantime, become a national maternal figure in her own right. “I have not had one regret about that. I also believe that part of the reason why I don’t have regrets is because I got to fulfil it in the way that was best for me: the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa,” she added. “Those girls fill that maternal fold that I perhaps would have had. In fact, they overfill – I’m overflowed with maternal.”

  • Oprah Winfrey is one of the richest entertainment moguls out there, boasting a net worth of US$3 billion in 2024 – but who’s her partner who’s been by her side since 1986?
  • Graham is an author of 12 books, a speaker and an educator; he is also a business adviser, and chairman and CEO of S. Graham and Associates, and has worked on leadership programmes across the globe