On marriage and babies, maybe China should listen to its citizens

In a national push, local governments in China have been roped in to promote marriage and childbirth as a social and economic duty
Beijing should tread gently though, as public attitudes towards where the state may apply its coercive powers have changed

Lijia Zhang

Published: 8:30pm, 31 Oct 2023

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On Chinese social media, there are many posts discussing China’s rules on marriage and divorce. In the past three years, Beijing has introduced a flurry of amendments and moved towards pronatalist policies. Among directives about child custody and matrimonial assets, the authorities now require divorcing couples to undergo mediation meetings, and a divorce can only be granted when both sides agree.

The marriage law itself has been integrated into China’s first civil code, a comprehensive legal framework that covers everything from inheritance to civil rights. Effective from January 2021, the fifth part of the code deals with marriage and family.

The most controversial rule is the one that forces couples to undergo a 30-day “cooling off” period before finalising a divorce. Worried about the trend of rising divorce rate, the authorities took the move to discourage impulsive divorce. Many citizens, however, fear it could interfere with their personal freedom.

That was my own worry too. As I watch the new developments, my concerns have only deepened. In May, China’s Family Planning Association was reported to be launching pilot projects in more than 20 cities to create a marriage and childbearing culture for a “new era”.

Some measures are laudable and necessary – for example, curbing outdated practices such as high “bride prices”, encouraging couples to share childcare responsibilities, and creating a more family-friendly work environment.

Other aspects of the projects, however, suggest that the state is adopting a more coercive approach as China’s young people put off starting families. One key task of the projects is to advocate getting married and having children at “the appropriate age”.

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Another key goal is to promote respect for “the social value of childbearing”. In Fuzhou, one of the pilot cities, the proposal for this new culture states: “Marriage and childbirth are not only family issues tied to personal happiness, but major issues affecting national survival and development.”

Throughout China, one now hears catchphrases urging one to “listen to the party, be grateful to the party, follow the party”. However, it is my fear that in following Beijing’s pronatalist policies, local governments might come up with plans that violate individual rights. Back in the 1980s, when the family planning policy was a national priority, many local governments and organisations did just that.

At the factory where I worked, for example, all female workers had to visit the “hygiene room” each month to show the “period police” proof that we were not pregnant. Then, we would get a bag of sanitary towels. While it was all done in the name of women’s social welfare, it was effectively part of the country’s strict family planning system.

Already, it has been suggested that party members should set a good example by having three children. When the one-child policy was first introduced, these people were also urged to set a good example by obeying the rule. China ended that notorious policy in 2016 and allowed couples to have up to three children in 2021, but not nearly enough people have taken up the offer. The country has entered an era of negative population growth.

Some pundits blame young people’s growing individualism for China’s rising divorce rate and plummeting birth rate. In 1950, when China introduced the marriage law, granting women the right to divorce (before then, a Chinese man could easily get rid of his wife), it was not intended to promote individualism but to allow women to end a miserable marriage.

Times have changed. Nowadays, people care more about their personal space and rights. In 2020, when CCTV posted a poll question on Weibo asking if people were in favour of the mandatory “cooling off” period for divorcing couples, most of the 600,000 comments said “no”. “Getting a divorce is my right” went a typical comment.

Authoritarian China has often introduced legislation on matters that in other countries would be regarded as private affairs. These laws guide public behaviour according to the government priority of the day, whether it is to control or stimulate population growth.

But attitudes towards where the state may apply its coercive powers have changed. The Chinese government can expect a backlash if it pushes the new pronatalist policies too rigidly. Beijing should listen to the people.

Lijia Zhang is a rocket-factory worker turned social commentator, and the author of a novel, Lotus